I had a whole other post planned and written but I’ve just had some really crappy news and I need to get what I’m feeling out of my system.
There’s a high chance that someone I used to be very fond of isn’t going to make it through the night. When I knew her she was a real live-wire – sparky, full of fun and always on the go. Then eighteen years ago she lost her brother in an accident and she’s never really recovered. I lost touch with her not long after when I got divorced from my first husband but I’ve carried on hearing news of her over the years.
Now she’s in intensive care and her family have been told to get to her as quickly as possible. The signs aren’t good – it looks like her parents will lose another child and her children will lose their mother.
I feel so sorry for all of them. I know some members of the family are angry with her – they see her illness as self-inflicted and see the pain she has caused to those around her, but all I can see is sorrow.
I see the sorrow of a young girl who was unable to escape the pain of losing a much-loved brother, and who tried to blot out that pain with drink.
I see the pain of her parents and siblings, who have already lived through losing one of their number and have spent years trying to prevent this likely second loss.
And I see the pain of her husband and children, who will presumably have to live with the knowledge that their presence wasn’t enough to help her to escape from her intolerable burden.
I will pray for a miracle to happen tonight, and for this all to end well. And I will also be praying for anyone else that feels afflicted by an intolerable burden. May your load be lightened.