GSOH required…

Okay, this is an experiment based on the Very Personal Ads that appear on The Fluent Self Blog, which I have just fallen in love with. The idea is that you write personal ads for things that, ordinarily you would never write personal ads for, as a way of getting better at asking for what you need. And since at the moment I’m looking for a very specific thing, I thought I’d give it a try, in the style of a Lonely Hearts Ad. Here goes!


  • a bit bruised by life and looking to fall in love with it all over again
  • sure the right life is waiting for you just over the horizon
  • ready to take a leap of faith into your own beautiful future
  • waiting for your journey to start


  • GSOH
  • Commitment, drive, energy and an appetite for Colour and Fairy Dust
  • A belief that the best is yet to come
  • A belief in your own self-worth


  • Passionate about meeting you and working with you
  • Committed to supporting you as you transform your life and realise your potential
  • Gagging to get started


  • A VIP Programme created with you in mind
  • Energy, experience and skill waiting to use for your benefit
  • 6 months of my time to devote to you

What I would rather not have

  • Comments about why it won’t work
  • Comments about why it’s too expensive – I’m not going to reduce my price because it’s a fair reflection of what I do and how much of my time it takes

Here’s how I want it to work

You’ll read this ad and think “Oh, My God, she’s talking to me!”

Then you’ll follow this link and think “She really IS talking to me”.

Then you’ll read this and think “How does she KNOW all that stuff that’s in my head?!”

And then you’ll email me at and say “Hi, I’m The One you’ve been looking for! Let’s make sweet, beautiful, colourful music together!”

My commitment to you

I promise to treat you like the VIP that you are throughout the programme.

I promise to use all of my skills, talents, experience and expertise to help you to transform every aspect of your life.

I promise that, if you get to the end of the programme and you haven’t been transformed, I’ll give you all your money back.

And I promise that you’ll have a Damn Good Time, make some fantastic new friends and never, ever regret that you took this opportunity. I might even take you out for dinner and buy you flowers….

Own teeth and hair not essential. Stalkers and perverts need not apply.

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