Hello my lovelies, thank you for joining me again on my journey of enlightenment.
Today has been a much calmer day altogether. I have had lovely conversations with 3 people as a result of yesterday’s plea to the Universe, and their help will be invaluable to me. Thank you Di, Tim and Jo, and thank you Universe.
I’ve given today over to doing whatever I felt guided to do. I was going to have a long lie in and not think about work at all but after an hour or so I got very restless and my guiding voice said “this isn’t going to help, go and talk to the Universe”.
I heard recently about a technique that goes by a variety of names but that basically involves having a conversation with whatever you believe to be your guiding force – in my case, the Universe – only rather than carrying it on in your head, which is what I usually do and what I have previously referred to as self-coaching, you actually write the conversation down.
I can see the wisdom in this. Writing goals down always makes them more real and therefore more achievable, and it’s one of the reasons I started blogging about my progress every day. The physical act of writing also slows down my thought processes, so it makes me concentrate more and enables me to hold onto ideas and thoughts for longer.
So I wrote down my conversation with the Universe and in doing so, I suddenly saw with utter clarity what’s been going on for me. That was then reinforced almost magically by a comment that was made to me in one of the 3 conversations I told you about. Here was a big, fat message coming at me And No Mistake.
The Creating the Impossible challenge that I have undertaken has been enlightening, empowering and all sorts of other words beginning with e that I can’t quite bring to mind now. It’s got me motivated, invigorated and taking action, all of which is great.
But what I have also allowed it to do is to sidetrack me from concentrating on my Mission and my Purpose. They’ve still been there and have come through on occasion, but I’ve allowed them to move away from being at the centre of my focus.
I have, instead, allowed my focus to get caught up on the idea of creating a million-pound business. That phrase was originally intended to be a useful shorthand to remind me that, much as I might like to, I can’t go on doing most of my work for free because we need to eat. It was meant to instill in me the idea that I CAN run a business (Who, me? A career Civil Servant? Hah!) and that it CAN be successful (Who me? Successful? Hah!).
While it’s gone some way to doing that it’s moved me further and further away from thinking about what’s really important, and that is of course the work that I do with my clients and my ability to be there for them.
When I told My Lovely Husband yesterday about how I was feeling he asked me whether I was still being of service to my clients and I replied that yes, of course I was. His reply was “Well good, cos that’s what’s really important isn’t it”.
And it is, and I’d been taking it for granted. In my conversation with the Universe this morning I realised that I’ve been wasting an awful lot of time by not recognising that the reality of what I do is all there before me in the changes I see happening for my clients on a day to day basis.
So yes, I need someone to help me put some structures and processes around HOW I work and how the business functions – and that’s being taken care of.
Yes, I need some help to market what I do more effectively – and that’s being taken care of.
And yes, I need to find ways for people to come to me as clients whatever their situation and in whatever way works for them – and that’s being taken care of.
But what I DON’T need to do, and what I was in danger of, is to start reinventing the wheel around what I do and what I offer. What my clients get is the essence of me, warts and all, doing my best to help them to make sense of who they are, why they’re here and what they want to do about it.
Just like I’m doing right now for myself. It’s big messy stuff and it’s pretty much impossible to do on your own – and I’m not very good at asking for help.
But yesterday I did it, and the help came to me, and I’m grateful.
And there’s something I didn’t tell you about my Gremlin yesterday. I said I could see it very clearly and it was all brown and gnarly and evil looking. What I didn’t mention was that next to it was a column of pure white light, very strong and clear and still. Today I realised that it was the Gremlin’s true reflection.
Our Gremlins are trying to help us but they’ve misunderstood what we need and so they go about it the wrong way. What my Gremlin was trying to do was to tell me to stop, slow down and spend more time BEING and less time DOING – because then the answers I needed would come.
So I shall continue to work through the lessons from Creating the Impossible, and I shall continue to blog my process. But now my Goal has changed.
My Goal is to find ways to help as many people as possible to figure out who they really are, why they’re really here, and what they want to do about it. That’s my Mission, and that’s what Colour In Your Thinking is all about. I neither need nor want to deviate from that path.
And I shall achieve it best by ensuring that I take the time I need to BE rather than spending all my time DOING. That way I can best be of service to my clients and myself.
Thank you, Universe for all your wisdom.