The Battle for Good and Evil

Me: I say Ego, could we have a little chat

Ego: Tra-la-la-la-la-la holly….fa la la la la la la a la

Me: Ego, I know you can hear me…

Ego: It’s Christmas time, there’s no need to be afraid.  At Christ…ooh look, more chocolate!!

Me: Yes, enough thank you, I neither need  nor want any more chocolate, I want to talk to you

Ego: Sorry, far too busy planning our outfit for New Year’s Eve, shall you wear the red velvet or the purple, do you think?

Me: EGO! SIT!!

Ego: Sigh….go on then, what is it?

Me: First of all, I want to say how much I admire your skill and dexterity

Ego: Eh?

Me: Well you’ve managed to pull the wool over my eyes for the best part of a month now and I’ve only just realised it in the last few days

Ego: Don’t know what you’re talking about. Sugared almond? Crystallised ginger?

Me: Thank you, no. And stop changing the subject. You know perfectly well what I’m talking about. You took one look at my decision to stop “doing” and start “being” and you jumped right into the gap, didn’t you?

Ego: Did I?

Me: Yes – you and your pal Mr Can’t B. Arsed.

Mr Can’t B. Arsed: Did someone call? ‘Fraid I can’t do anything at the moment, I’ve just eaten my own body weight in Turkish Delight and I’m feeling a bit sticky. Could you just roll me up in another blanket and put the Poirot Box-Set on again?

Me: Now listen you two. You have been helpful to me, to some extent, and I know that’s really what you want, isn’t it.

Ego/Mr C.B.A: Er…yes, yes of course…

Me: You’ve led me very kindly onto the sofa, you’ve snuggled me up with endless cups of tea and old films, you passed me plates of cakes and you’ve very effectively helped me to withdraw from all that frantic and formless doing that I was getting lost in, so Thank You.

Ego: Welcome, I’m sure

Mr C.B.A: There’s a “but” coming, I can feel it….stuff a biscuit in her mouth, quick…

Me: NO MORE BISCUITS!!! You’re right, there is a “but” coming…Thank You for helping me to step back from all the doing, BUT your real skill has lain in blind-siding me to what the “being” was supposed to be all about, hasn’t it. Just “being” isn’t about vegetating and getting fat and putting everything off till some mythical tomorrow that never comes. It’s not about letting whole days drift by having done absolutely nothing productive. The odd day doing that is glorious, yes – but it’s glorious because it’s a treat. When it becomes the norm it’s not a treat at all, it’s just laziness. And you two, of all people, know that I already see myself as unbelievably lazy so encouraging me to be even lazier is NOT HELPFUL!!!

Ego: Don’t shout dear, it makes your nostrils flair unattractively. And you’ll wake Mr C.B.A up. And we were only trying to help….

Me: Yes, but WHO were you trying to help in letting me give in to my inner slug?

Ego: Well you…obviously…

Me: Really?

Ego:…well, all of us, obviously, I mean we’re all different bits of you aren’t we…

Me: Don’t forget I sussed you out a while back. Think carefully before you answer…

Ego: Oh all right, I was trying to help myself! I want things to stay the way they’ve always been! We’ve managed to get you to the age of 46 without ever really having to put much effort into anything! You never had to try hard to do well at school and when there were subjects you didn’t like or found difficult, you could drop them! We encouraged you to chicken out of going to University because it was scary and seemed like hard work and we’ve managed to help you keep that attitude going to just about everything till pretty recently. If it’s looked like it might be difficult or scary we’ve convinced you that you didn’t want to do it and you could get by just by concentrating on the stuff that didn’t take much of an effort.

Mr Can’t B. Arsed: Yeah, and now you’ve gone and changed all that and you keep wanting to TALK to us and tell us we’re doing the wrong things and we just want things to be the way they always have been!

Me: Yes, I know you do. And I understand, really I do. But they can’t be like they used to be and I don’t WANT them to be like they used to be. There is so much more I can be and so much more I can give, but it takes effort and it means breaking through barriers of fear. I don’t want, any more, to give in when things get a bit challenging.

Ego: But we do, and we’re stronger. There’s more of us than there are of you, and we’ve been doing pretty well over the past couple of months, a bit at a time. We’ve done some pretty nifty sabotaging, if I do say so myself, and fortified as we now are on mince pies and cake, I’m pretty sure it won’t take us long before this little rebellion subsides. Glass of Sherry?

The Universe: Aren’t you forgetting something?

Ego/Mr C.B.A: Oh that’s not fair, who invited you?

Me: I did of course. It may have looked as if I was giving in to your temptations but the Universe and I have been having some quiet chats over the past couple of days. We’ve been making plans…

Ego: Ha! Well they won’t last long, your plans never do! You’ll come up with a different one tomorrow and another one the day after that so that in the end nothing will come of any of them!

Me: Only if I let you in on the planning. Without you there insinuating that there’s always a better idea to be had, or another way of doing things, or that this idea might be not quite right, I can plan and execute that plan really rather well.

Ego: Only trying to help, as I’ve said before, don’t want you making mistakes, do we?

Me: I know that, but there has to come a point at which I take an action and follow it through. Constantly planning and never doing is FAR more of a mistake than making a decision, following up and learning from anything that might not have gone very well so I can make it better next time, can’t you see that?

Ego: Well, but…..but….are you saying I’ve been making you make mistakes? Leading you towards failure?

Me: Yes – and I’ve chosen to let you, time and time again. But now it must stop. Please.

Ego: Oh. Right. I think I need to go away and think about all this. Can we talk about this some more tomorrow?

Me: Yes, of course we can.

The Universe: Atta girl.


3 responses to “The Battle for Good and Evil

  1. An interesting portrayal of the fact that we are multi-faceted creatures caught up in the age-old battleground of good and evil. In Christian teaching, soulish desires (the soul being made up of mind, will and emotions) are conquerable when subjected to the Spirit – ie God, or the (Maker of the) Universe, if you like.

    Forgive the following “Bible study” but your dialogue recalls the “end of Romans 7, beginning of Romans 8 dichotomy” set out 2000 years ago in the New Testament:

    Romans 7:15 “For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

    21 So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; 23 but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. 24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?

    25 Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God’s law, but in my sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.

    Romans 8:1 Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. 3 For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, 4 in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.

    5 Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. 7 The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. 8 Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God.

    9 You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. 10 But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life because of righteousness. 11 And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you”.

    (This is me again …!)
    This (potential for) liberation in and through Jesus is surely worth celebrating – and what more appropriate time to do so than at Christmas?
    It is a time for feasting and enjoyment … with a thankful heart … before resuming a daily walk in His Way and in the power which He gives. There is therefore no condemnation! And this is a reason for shouting Hallelujah! If we are able to accept this Christmas Gift, we are on course to live a life full of the fruit of the Spirit:

    Galatians 5:16 “So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law…

    Galatians 5.22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires”.

    Sorry if this sounds preachy! It’s a “sermon to self” after an over-extended period of self-indulgence! Feel free to delete this post if you like (I won’t mind!)

    Hope you had/are still having a Happy Christmastime!


    • Sharon, thank you for that – why on earth would I want to get rid of it?! The language may be a bit archaic but it’s an excellent reminder that, whatever names we give to the different aspects of our personal humanity and/or spirituality, the central teachings are all pretty much the same. I’m sure there will be passages like this in The Koran, the Talmud and just about every other sacred text you care to name (and that I, shamefully, can’t remember right now…).

      So what you (and the Bible) understand to be The Spirit is what I mean when I talk about The Universe. And what I try to do in my work is help people to see themselves with new eyes, in full glorious colour so that they become fully aware of the Spirit/Universe/Real Self inside and can live in harmony with it.

      Please do keep posting any links you see between stuff I put here and your own personal understanding of spirituality – that goes for everyone, not just Sharon

  2. Who has been reading my mind. This sounds exactly like my life!!

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